YOU CAN’T WIN AN ARGUMENT

In my 3rd year at the University, one of our lecturers, a Professor of literature during one of her lectures tried to relate a doctrine of ethics in philosophy to one of the themes of literature we were studying at that time and to be honest, it didn’t sound correct.

I was certain it was incorrect even though I was a student of the English Department because I spent almost all my leisure time, studying books on philosophy and logic and that made me very vast especially on doctrines related to ethics.

I tried asking a few questions and offering some insinuations to put my prof in perspective until it became quite clear that he wasn’t grounded on the subject matter so I offered the right opinion by delving into the history of the doctrine and the current proponents.

My coursemates made things worse by applauding me in that class. I was immediately ushered out of the class and banned never to attend any more lectures until the exam period. I was lucky the lecturer was on sabbatical when we sat for the course exams.

I wish I read from Dale Carnegie sooner about how to handle arguments. The truth is, No one wins an argument even if you have superior thoughts. If you are ever declared a winner in that stance, you will be seen by your opponent as an enemy because you made them look bad.

We must find better ways to advance our discussions if we must win in this world that is fuelled by diverse opinions.

Next time, I meet any Prof, I will always find better ways of expressing my views and maybe not publicly.

“A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still: if you argue with a man and you win, you have lost, if you lose it, you have also lost because if you win, you may only have succeeded in making the man inferior. He will resent your triumph” — Dale Carnegie

Shalom.